I wish you knew…

Bonnie Andrews

(Owner, BonJo Studios LLC)

“I wish you knew the power of putting yourself first.”

Now that I’m older I feel unstoppable but I can only imagine how unstoppable I could’ve been if I learned to prioritize myself sooner.

Rebecca Karcher

(Director of Communication & Community Engagement, Trinity English Lutheran Church)

“Remember when you were this age and you thought getting older was fun because you got to do more things and have more opportunities? I wish you would keep that in your heart and in your mind. Even though you're getting older, there are still a lot of fun things ahead and a lot of new things to do!"

Rachelle Reinking

(Director of Communications, Arts United of Greater Fort Wayne)

“I wish you knew that you can't loathe yourself into self-acceptance. Healing will come when you realize you are more than your achievements."

I struggled a lot as a kid with needing the acceptance of others and constantly was concerned with how I was perceived. I tried to outweigh my low self-esteem by overcompensating with a perfectionist, high achieving personality. This not only didn't raise my confidence but also burnt me out time again throughout my life. It took me a long time to make the connection that I wouldn't be accepting of myself until I flipped the mirror around to explore who I wanted to be, rather than who I thought that I should be when people looked at me.

Darius Darling

(HR Specialist, Brotherhood Mutual)

“I wish you knew that your worth is not identified by people but by who you really are. You will be faced with a lot of challenges because of your various differences but just know that you're worth every effort, all the time, and all the energy.”

Growing up, I was forced to realize that I was very different than others. I physically looked different than my classmates and friends. I quickly began to feel bad or less than due to these differences. It was my grandmother who told me early on that it was okay to be different and people who talk about you, don't understand God's plan for you. I did not understand it then, but now, I realize that everything she said prepared me for the difficulties I would face and overcome throughout my life's work.

Danielle Wildes

(Marketing & Social Media at K. Monique's Studio of Dance, Fitness Instructor at Triumph Studios)

“I wish you knew that your purpose is going to come to you entirely unexpectedly and to not stress out about it if you don’t have everything figured out now. You might not have it in a week or a month, but eventually God is going to point you to your purpose.”

Growing up, I remember the stress of trying to figure out "what I wanted to be when I grew up," and just when I thought I had it down, God sent me in an entirely different direction, weaving me through different paths to get to where I am today.

Rachele Jordan

(Owner, Anytime Fitness)

“I wish you knew that you're going to be okay. Your circumstances are not going to last forever and you're going to be okay. You're going to grow up to be so successful, you're going to be adventurous, you're going to love and be loved, you're going to create stability, and that your circumstances now don't matter. In fact, they're building strength for your future so that you can live a very fulfilling life and go after what you want and have everything that you needed. So I wish you knew that you're going to be okay!”

I moved out when I was thirteen years old. I went from a rough childhood to a life of abundance and much success!

Donna Masterson

(Director of Residential Services, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

"I wish you knew that everything you go through, you can grow through."

Noel Cerda

(Educational Technologist, Ivy Tech Community College)

"I wish you knew that your feelings are valid and you don't have to lock them up and put them away on a shelf for later. You're not any less of a person for getting upset, frustrated, or sad. It's okay to not be okay."

I was raised to be emotionally stoic and stalwart which made it very difficult to express emotions or even talk about them. Growing up, I was taught that sadness and anger were “bad” feelings that need to be locked down and put on the shelf, or risk punishment/repercussions from someone. It taught me to be resilient but at the cost of being emotionally cold, distant, hard to read, or unable to communicate emotions or where I’m at.

Amanda Framme

(Senior Paralegal, Lincoln Financial)

“I wish you knew that you won't always be that shy girl. You will grow up to be a confident person who's not afraid to speak up.”

Carmen Cumberland

(President and CEO, Community Harvest Food Bank of Northeast Indiana, Inc.)

“I wish you knew that it's okay not to have all the answers right now. Life has a way of working things out, and you're more than capable than you give yourself credit for.”

This reminds me to give myself grace. I don't need to have all the answers - I just need to trust the process which has led to some of the best moments of my life.

Jess Hopkins

(FVP, Regional Sales Manager, First Merchants Bank)

“I wish you knew that your failures don’t define you, they are stepping stones that challenge you to be better.”

Often we get lost when we lose, versus taking what we learned as a gift and using it as a tool to be more successful going forward. Focus with a growth mindset.

Eric Manor

(Associate Chief for Campus and Community Wellbeing, Purdue University Fort Wayne)

“I wish you knew that one day the small, ordinary moments you're rushing past now are the ones you'll miss the most.”

Harini Bonam

(Community Volunteer)

“I wish you knew that it’s okay to be curious and ask questions! You don’t need to be in a position of authority to make a difference in the community. All you need are the 3 “I’s” …make an intention, think of the impact, and work with integrity!”

It has become much more meaningful and very significant as I age, because I have realized over the last few years that all those things I mentioned are my true authentic self! I have made small differences in various situations just by being genuine and reacting with my most natural instinct at that time!

Chelsea Devantez

(Filmmaker, TV Writer, Host of the podcast Glamorous Trash)

“I wish you knew that this wasn’t just happening to you. I know you think that this is only happening because you’re weird or you did something wrong or that this wouldn’t happen to a different type of girl from a different life. I wish I could tell you that none of those things are true. It’s happening to women and girls unjustly everywhere and it’s happening to people that you know and the only reason we’re not talking about it is because everyone feels the same amount of shame and embarrassment because they think it’s just them. I wish you knew that it’s not just you.”

Dottie Davis

(Founder/President, Davis Corporate Training, Inc.)

“I wish I knew that if you learn to love and trust yourself, and understand that you deserve to be treated with respect, a healthy relationship would follow.”

Kara Kelley

(Owner, President, CEO, Asher Agency)

“I wish I knew to always be kind. You never know when people are going to come back into your life. The world is small, so always be kind.”

Karl Einolf

(President, Indiana Tech)

“I wish you knew that the greatest joys in your life will come from taking a leap of faith and getting out of your comfort zone. Put a smile on, find confidence, and go for IT.”

Growth begins where comfort ends—smile, trust yourself, and take the leap.

Breanna C. Johnson

(Poet & Advocate, Poetz Portal)

“I wish you knew that you are destined for greatness and this moment is just the beginning of your rebirth.”

At 17 I did not fully recognize the strength I had to carry on after being sexually assaulted. Now at 28, my poetry and advocacy is an ode to 17-year-old Bre and a continuation of her legacy.

Irene Paxia

(Executive Director, The Language Access Lab)

“I wish you knew that you are right: you should follow your values and do what you think is right, not just what is easy or convenient. It will be rewarding. Be yourself and remember to breathe as you go. The journey is long - trust your process, your vision, and lean on others. You are loved.”

Allison Nicklin

(Director of Project Management, JH Specialty, Inc.)

“I wish you knew that it's ok to ask for help. It doesn't diminish you being a strong, independent woman to ask for help when you need it.”

As an only-child I often did things on my own, which has bled into my adult life. Asking for help feels like the opposite of that independence I grew up with. However, nobody can do it alone and it doesn't make you any less to ask for help. It can free you up to be more uniquely you.

Edwin Chow

(Owner, Summit City Climbing Co.)

“I wish you knew it was okay to ask for help.”

Life is hard and it's meant to be lived in community.

Jenee Johnson

(Teacher, FWCS)

“I wish you knew that all the unique things about you make you an original. Own your uniqueness!”

Cheryl Schmandt

(Owner/CEO, Dynamic Solutions 2 Bookkeeping LLC)

“I wish you knew you were enough, worthy, and valuable.”

I didn’t always feel this way about myself.

Paula Hughes-Schuh

(CEO, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

“I wish you knew that you were doing the right things all along. You grew up to be exactly who you wanted to be.”

Mitch McKinney

(Detective Sergeant, Fort Wayne Police Department)

“I wish you knew that there is a bigger world and you are good enough to make a difference early in life.”

Life was a struggle in a low income household with 5 siblings. Lots of love and faith carried us through. Find your way and know that you can have the successful life you want. It is not a dream, it is a goal. Achieve it!

Lydia Young

(Retired QC and Sunday School Teacher | Business Owner of Be Happy Puppets)

“Lydia, I wish you knew that you shouldn’t have trusted your wisdom as an 18-year-old girl in love and you should have listened to your uncle.”

Be open to guidance from those who care about you, they often have your best interests at heart. Listening to my uncle could have saved me 26 years of heartache.

Amy Hanna

(VP and Chief Development Officer, Fort Wayne Museum of Art)

“I wish you knew that you are valuable, that your life is important, and that you matter.”

As a child, I questioned my worth and if my life really mattered. As an adult, I can't imagine this world without me in it. I now know my value and make it my life mission to help others to see their value too.

Brett Gauger

(Marketing Communications Specialist, Elevatus Architecture)

“I wish you knew--purpose is lived. Every day is a chance to make someone feel seen, valued, and welcomed. Make the days count. Bring positivity to the surface, even in small ways. Your kindness matters. Your light makes an impact. Be the reason someone believes in good again.”

This is meaningful to me because we never know the battles others face. When we lead with grace, hope, and determination, we grow together. We move forward. Purpose is injected into everything we do. Let's support passion and put it to power.

Julian Teekaram

(Journalist, WPTA-TV)

“I wish you knew that you’re on your own timeline and that whatever is meant for you will happen at the right time!”

Mayor Sharon Tucker

(City of Fort Wayne)

“I want you to know that you don’t have to worry about what people think! You’ve spent so much time as the younger you worrying about what people will think but I want you to show up authentically and just be yourself. The world will accept you for who you are because of the gifts you have to bring to the conversation. And you don’t have to worry about being perfect, you don’t have to worry about having on the right clothes, and you don’t have to worry about your size being just the right size. Just show up every day authentically as you are.”

Tabitha DeSeranno

(Web Designer, Spark & Soul Design Studio)

“I wish you knew that the version of you that you’re becoming… She’s worth the struggle.”

If I could sit down with 17-year-old me, scared, exhausted, and holding a newborn in her arms, I’d tell her this:

1. You are not a failure. Being a teen mom doesn’t define you... what you do next does.
2. You are stronger than you think. Life is about to test you in ways you can’t imagine, but trust me... you’ll keep standing.
3. You don’t have to have it all figured out today... You’ll change your major 5 times. You’ll start a business you never planned for. You’ll grow into someone you never expected to be. And one day? You’ll build a life you’re truly proud of.

Life is full of twists and turns but we are resilient and can overcome all the obstacles it decides to throw at us. My journey from teen mom to CEO has most definitely had its ups and downs but in the end, it's all worth it.

Jackie Stancil

(Executive Director, Career Development Center, Purdue Fort Wayne)

“I wish you knew the power of the word ‘should.’ Every time you think ‘what should I do?’ you’re allowing others to make the decision for you.”

When you say “should” you’re giving the power to someone else. Trust yourself.

Emma Walker

(Sexual Violence Coordinator, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

“I wish you knew your resilience and empathy are gifts, not hindrances.”

Growing up I despised these two qualities about myself, but today I choose to view them as superpowers. They are the reason I am here and whole.

Anthony Juliano

(VP/GM, Asher Agency)

“I wish you knew that it was all going to work out and that most of the things you worried about were never going to happen and that life would bring you so much more than you could ever imagine.”

I grew up with a number of serious challenges so I was almost constantly anxious. But thanks to some good people and a little perseverance, I've been very fortunate to have a pretty incredible life.

Aisha Diss

(Executive Director, project.ME)

“I wish you knew that honoring yourself is the key. When you do, everything else will fall into place.”

I am a person in long term recovery and not honoring myself kept me stuck in unhealthy patterns for far too long.

Whitney Bandemer

(Principal, WB Consulting, LLC)

“I wish you knew that joy, happiness, and success in life is more about going with the flow than it is designing and running a perfect plan.”

Life happens in the detours, embrace and maximize the unexpected remembering that the beautiful lotus grows from the dirtiest mud.

Kathy Gaines

(Retired Educator, FWCS)

"I wish you knew that it's always okay to be yourself and speak your truth. You no longer have to be silent to make others comfortable."

Sometimes it’s hard to speak your truth because we don’t want to make others uncomfortable. However, your truth is what defines you and altering that will not give an authentic view of who you are. I have learned over the years that authenticity is very important and I can’t be quiet so that you can be comfortable.

Anthony Petruzzelli

(Professional Hockey Player, Fort Wayne Komets)

"I wish you knew that all your hard work would pay off."

My younger self would be so proud to know that his hard work resulted in the opportunity to play hockey for a living! There were many times I doubted all the extra effort I was putting in and I wish I could tell him it's worth it. My hope is to instill a strong work ethic and 'never give up' attitude that becomes a habit both on and off the ice in the kids I coach.

TC Spellman

(Education Coordinator, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

"I wish you knew how many people you're going to make smile one day."

Candice Hall

(Director of Clinical & Recovery Services, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

"I wish you knew that the way other people see you does not define who you are."

Diamond Mims

(Children's Services Coordinator, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

"I wish you knew life would not be easy, but don't give up. Keep going. You have great things to accomplish."

Your resilience will be your strength. Don't try to fit in when you were born to stand out. You will be a beacon of light for others. Speaking to your inner child is a great way to heal inner wounds or bring forth trauma that you may not realize was there. Speak to your inner child.

Dave Shadburne

(President & CEO, MidWest America Federal Credit Union)

"I wish you knew that it's okay to work hard, but don't let work define you. And also, It's okay to set your own priorities and your own path to success. You don't have to let others do that for you."

This advice will lead to greater levels of satisfaction and happiness with lower levels of stress.

Sydney Kent

(Community Educator, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

"I wish you knew you become the person that you needed."

Dear younger me: I wish you knew that at this age, you were just learning how the world worked. You were not a burden. And though life will get harder before it gets better, I want you to know it's going to be okay. You become the person you needed one day.

Carla Kilgore

(Director of Mission Advancement, YWCA Northeast Indiana)

"I wish you knew that your strong sense of right and wrong is a gift and even when it makes you or other people uncomfortable, it's good to share."

I want to help build a future where all children grow up knowing that those impulses towards right and wrong, compassion, and justice are important guides to hold onto throughout the hard times, and those values help make our community better.